The Sophomore Diaries: When We Feel Alone

“Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; For You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.”      Psalm 23:4

When we feel alone

October 17, 2013

I haven’t posted in over a month. Besides me being lazy, Ive had a boatload of schoolwork and tests, and work. Everything has just been jumbled up. I finally have a free day, not completely free, but free enough for me to sit down and blog in my Discrete Structures class and still understand most of what my professor is saying. 🙂

So what’s been happening in my life you ask? Well nothing really. I’ve been BORED!! Schoolwork killed my social life (not like I had one before….). And I’ve gotten fat. I can’t fit into my clothes from summer 😦 … Okay not fat, but I’ve gotten bigger. So I told myself I’m gonna start working out. I told myself that last week Monday… Today is Thursday and I haven’t made it to the gym yet lol. I need motivation! I was supposed to go with my friend, but then he chickened out on me. And plus I still have to buy my gear, and to be quite honest, your girl is broke! So much for my saving up. (See me making excuses for my own laziness. God help me)

This past weekend was my church’s 1st year anniversary. It was a wonderful time for my church full of joy and celebration and….. FOOD (And it was good too). I just thank God for keeping us and all of our members through this first year of our church’s existence. And I thank God because there are an infinite number of years full of blessings, testimonies and miracles to come for us. (Say Amen and claim it for yourself too.)

Your probably wondering why the title of my post is “When We Feel Alone” and simply put, that’s what it means. Lemme just write down what I’m feeling right now. Uhh, to put emotions into words is not always easy. Sometimes I feel by myself. I feel like where has everyone gone? Why is it just me? Sometimes I feel so left out and everything. The smile on my face hides everything. Ugh I don’t even know what to say or how to say it… But your girl is unhappy.

So that’s why I’ve put that particular bible verse at the top. Even when WE feel we have no one, God is with us. He will definitely take care of us and everything that concerns us. All we have to do is just trust him.

Even though we walk through the valley of the shadow of death, we shall fear no evil. For God is with us. His rod and his staff, they comfort us.

Have a blessed week Beautifuls.

God Bless You

xx

Tomi.

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The Sophomore Diaries: Random Week 1

“Open rebuke is better than hidden love. Better are the wounds of a friend, than the deceitful kisses of an enemy.” Proverbs 27:5-6

random week

September 13, 2013.

How are ya’ll doing this week Beautifuls? I am ever so sorry for the late post!! I had homework due by 11:59 pm last night, and I was on that throughout yesterday! Today is Friday the 13th! Talking about bad luck! It almost hit me this morning, but my God said no. Today is the day they collect trash in my neighborhood, and I accidentally threw my keys in the big trash can outside my house. If I didn’t need to go to school, thats how the dump truck would have taken my keys oh!!

I am so tired right now! I’ve been waking up at 5 am almost every day just to get ready for work. And I usually don’t go home until late, because I’m studying or going for tutoring or stuff like that. I feel bad that I don’t live on campus because I’d have more time for everything to be honest. I wouldn’t have to worry about driving or parking spaces so that would cut off like1 hour and 30 minutes from my 3 hour preparation and I’d have an ample amount of time to sleep. And the library is open 24/5 so I’d be able to read overnight in the library or something. But in my house my bed is right next to my desk, and as soon as I open my book, I’m gone, off to bed I go especially with my hectic schedule. If I lived on campus, my parents wouldn’t have to be calling me wondering where I am and asking me to come home that it’s too late. And I wouldn’t have to be driving almost 35 minutes with the top-down on my car so I won’t fall asleep while driving, especially at night just to get home. Like do you catch my drift? Do you see my struggle? I’ve been kinda scared to talk to my parents about it, especially my dad, but since he’s the only one at home at the moment, I finally got up the courage to let him know a little of how I was feeling. All I said was ” Daddy, I think you should really consider me living on campus next year, especially now that my subjects are getting harder, I can’t be doing this everyday.” And he said we would talk about it when my mom mom comes back, so everybody keep your fingers crossed for me lol. I’m actually gonna calculate the price of gas compared to the cost of living over the course of 3 months and use it as a point.

As for my job, I think it’s actually worth it. I really want to do this study-abroad program, so I’m praying the Lord will provide money for my family, so I can go. It would be a wonderful opportunity and great exposure, and plus it would look good on a resume :). I wanted to do the fashion opportunity, but it was almost $17,000 for an 11 week semester in Paris. I jejely (carefully) helped myself to turn the page lol. There is no way my parents will pay $16K for a semester of fashion in another country. (And all of that doesn’t include housing, transportation, plane ticket, books or food.)

For a quick second I wanna talk about Miley. I’m not hating or anything but her new song “Wrecking Ball” I LOVE IT, I LOVE LOVE LOVE the song. But I HATE HATE HATE the video. The beginning was nice, and cute, where she was all crying and looking all innocent (Sorry but that part was so Adele. At first I thought Adele was actually singing) and then next thing you know, she’s riding naked on a wrecking ball. Please can somebody tell me what that has to do with the song? Does everything have to be sexual with this girl? Like I was really feeling the song and all but then.. Ugh! 😦 Scratch the video. And so she explained it, that’s her own business. SO she was licking the hammer because she secretly likes the pain. That is quite interesting. But hey, to each their own.

I’m gonna start being that friend that gives wounds like stated in the bible verse above. I’m not kissing up to anyone again. If you do something wrong, I will tell you, if you offend me I will tell you straight up. To be honest I’ve been a little too nice. I wanna be the friend that if you want the absolute truth you can come to in confidence. And I want the same from you too. If I offend you tell me straight up, if I do something wrong don’t let it slide, it may hurt a little bit, but I can handle it. Now I don’t mean do it all the time, and I don’t mean be really mean about it. But be a friend and I’ll be one too. See if we do this all the time, we’d rarely have beef because we are all telling each other what we’ve done wrong. The world would be a better place yo. I refuse to be the enemy that tells you lies.

Well all in all, this week was pretty chilled. Pretty boring to be honest. Uh, I did my hair, shopped a little. Went for physics tutoring that helped a quite  a lot.  Nothing interesting. I’m really sorry this post is boring. 😦

I actually had a little more to write, but I guess its not for this post. Its more of a little background on why I created this blog. But that’s gonna have to be when I have more time, or else this post would be super long.

Till next week Beautifuls!

xx

Tomi.

The Sophomore Diaries: Why Me?

“Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always.” 1 Chronicles 16:11

Hey Beautifuls!!! How are ya’ll so far this week? Well I’m great, (Thanks for asking). Welcome back to this week’s diary entry in the Sophomore Diaries. This past week wasn’t so boring actually. But let’s get into it.

crying.jpg

WHY ME? September 5, 2013.

(Okay so maybe the picture is a little too cheesy….)

Oh my, the funniest and probably the worst day ever for me this week was on Tuesday September 3rd. Okay so I finally got the job!!! (There was supposed to be a post about that a long time ago, but I kinda forgot……) So I was to start work on that day right? I was extremely tired the night before so I just set my alarm for 5am because I have to be at work at 8 and I have a lot of stuff to do every morning before I leave for school because my mom isn’t around. So I tried to figure out what to do to my hair, but it didn’t work out so I just went to sleep, I didn’t plan what I was going to wear or anything and a female just went to bed. AND THEN THE UNBELIEVABLE OCCURRED!!!!

I woke up wondering why my alarm wasn’t ringing. I looked at the clock and it was 7:30am. 7:30AM!!! I ran out of my room and asked my dad was it really 7:30, that maybe my clock had stopped or something. But nope, it was actually 7:30am. My dad saw me panicking and was wondering what was wrong, that’s when I told him that that was my first day of work and I was already late. He was so surprised I hadn’t told him. But at 7:35 I rushed to brush my teeth lol, put on deodorant and found myself color rioting to school (mind you, I did not take a shower, I had to sacrifice that to not be horribly late on the first day.) Within 5 minutes of waking up, I was in the car and on my way. I was speeding like mad. It was like The Transporter. You should have actually seen my driving skills. I was crying all the way to school asking God why he hadn’t let me wake up earlier. I was crying mainly because I had already planned out that morning. And when things don’t go according to how I planned, I tend to not be completely happy. But I was really trying a make a good first impression on my first day. My mom just happened to call me, and I was bawling all over the phone and she just told me to give my supervisor a call, and tell her I got caught in traffic (which I did…… it happened to be really minor, but it was true so…)  Finally I got to school at 8:10 AM. I spent about 15 minutes looking for a parking space before I decided to go park in the visitor lot and run to my office. Now I did that at my own risk, kuz if they find out I’m a student. They would fine me.

And then I went to work. Let me not begin to talk about how horrible my hair looked. Eyes red and everything, I arrived at 8:30am. But fortunately I smelled good. Looool.

Fortunately the rest of my day went well. Made a new friend. Quiet young chap. He tried to help me with my homework. But that didn’t work out. But he told me about his professor for one of our classes, and I switched over to his class, and he was telling the truth. The professor is Italian and he explains things so well, I’m so happy, I got the last seat in his class.

Guess what happened guys! When I turned on my alarm for the next day, I realized that I had set my alarm for 5PM not AM, I just laughed at myself. It was too funny. Gosh! I’m never gonna make that mistake again.

On Saturday I had this wonderful conversation with a bank manager. It was focused on “Which came first, The plant or the seed”. I chose the plant, and he chose the seed. And we were talking about it for well over an hour, he even brought out the bible to make sure and I was right. After a while we were just talking about God, church and other things Christian. At the end, he told me to come back again if I have any challenging question and that this was one of the most interesting conversations he’s ever had while working at that bank. God bless his dear soul.

This past week, I’ve just been hauling everywhere (getting a lot of stuff). I think I shopped everyday. Last Friday, my best friend and I went thrifting which was so much fun. We got a lot of stuff, I bout like 10 things for about $23. I think my favorite item was these high waist straight leg pants, just beautiful. Maybe when I go on a big enough haul, I’ll blog about it, and put pictures. I’ve been shopping all over the place. I bought the cutest blazer at Dillards the other day! Its a black kind of circus conductor blazer, but it’s too cute. Everything in the store was half off on Labor Day, and it was the last one. And mind you, I go where I can get good deals. Unless its shoes, you can never see me buying a pair of jeans for $50….. or a dress.. I just aint got that kinda money yet. But the Lord will prosper me.  And you too. Amen!!

Sorry this post was really rushed. I am so busy and stressed this week, balancing work and school and all, God will help me get it together in Jesus name. I’m about to go for tutoring too. Physics doesn’t seem to wanna be my friend this afternoon.

Thanks for reading!!!

Come back next week!!

Love you Beautifuls,

xx

Tomi.

The Sophomore Diaries: The Beginning

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” 2 Corinthians 5:17

Why Hello there Beautiful People. If I could see you, I would tell you how much God has blessed you and made you whom you are for a very good reason. But I can’t see you, but still know that’s how I feel.

Today I start a new segment in my blog: THE SOPHOMORE DIARIES. Well basically, I’m a sophomore (meaning Im in my second year or rather I’ve completed 30+ hours/untis/credits) in my Uni, and I really felt like documenting my experiences and all that good stuff and I kinda miss having a diary. So I’m going to try to be updating every Thursday, because school just happened to start on a Thursday  (Earlier than everyone else, My Uni sucks lol 😦 ) And I temporarily do not have a camera or photographer, and quite frankly editing is a hassle lol. So rather than letting my blog be idle, I might as well do something right? So here we goo!!!

Sophomore DIaries

The Beginning. August 29, 2013

SO school just happened to start on Thursday, August the 22nd. I still wonder who makes up these dumb things in this place! Besides the fact that it’s earlier than everyone else… Who starts school in the middle of the week?? Ugh! I could’ve used the two extra days I was deprived of to make my mind aware that I’d be heading to school. Like I even forgot to buy all my notebooks and stuff until the night before. The struggle is a real one. What sucks even more is that I’m still not living on campus.  I wish I was but hey, everything happens for a reason.

I’m all about making new friends and all, but I’m really shy when it comes to talking to people in class, like its really weird for me. So last week in my physics class on friday, you know, I came in a little after everyone kinda lost looking for my class and all, (fortunately the professor came late) and I sat down in the middle of the 3rd row (yes I remember these things) and so the girl next to me starts talking to me and all. And then the guy on my right joins in the conversation. And then we’re all talking and then after class I notice the girl and the guy are walking a bit faster and I no longer have input in the conversation, and I’m like “OH MY GOSH”, “DID I JUST GET LEFT?”, they used me to set P oh. That’s how the next class on Monday I looked at her, and this female acted like she aint even know me. It’s kuz my hair was orange and nappy, thats why. Or kuz uhh I dunno. But I’m just like “man, forget you 😛 I aint even talk to you first though, so I don’t need you.” But I did end up making a friend kinda. This girl named Taylor at the library…….. Yeah her. Shoutout to you if you’re reading! And if you’re not, Imma find you kuz I told you to read my blog. -_-

I’m tryna learn how to skateboard too. That stuff just looks soo cool tbh. So if you know how to skate, Holla at me!!!

Oh yeah… What else? I’ve been avoiding people. Yes it’s true I’m avoiding everyone. But then I’m kinda not, because I don’t see anyone on campus anymore so I can’t avoid people anyway kuz they’re not even here. :/ So I guess I’m not. But if I were, then… uhh… Well… It’s not you, it’s me.. I still love you :* . I’m not tryna be a loner or anything, I think I want to expand my horizons when it comes to those I hang out with. Man I want to have friends of all nationalities, you know what I mean? I’m sure you do. But if you don’t then oh well.

OH MY GOSH!!! Books and stuff be so expensive in this country. Like These college bookstore people are thieves, 419, awon ole buruku ( means “Thieves” in Yoruba). And its annoying how they want you to buy the school’s version of everything. How can ordinary English textbook be almost $300!?! I think the most annoying thing is when you’re not even gonna use the book for more than a semester. Let me tell you now if you don’t know. For those of us in the States (I dunno where else)  Amazon and Chegg and all those other vendors are your best friends when it comes to textbooks. You can find new ones on there for even cheaper than what the school bookstores charge for their Used books. And when you wanna sell your books back to the school they’ll probably only give you like 1/4 of the price you originally paid… Amazon can be so worth it at times. And if you know you’re not gonna need it in the future, just rent the book, really. It’s not worth the waste of money.

The last final thing. OMG!! I met an old friend from when I was younger, we used to go to the same church when I was about 7 or 8, and I remember I used to have this crush on him, and Boy has he grown to be a fine young man. And he just happens to go to my Uni. If you’re reading this… Then Hey!! Wassuppp!! Haha his head use to be soo big and round lol and he was really tall that time. Oh how I miss those days lol.  Meeting him again brought back memories from my childhood that I had long forgotten.

Well you know, It’s the first week of school, so nothing interesting really happened. Hopefully my life won’t be so boring this semester.

PS. Im probably gonna get really fat this semester, I’ve just been eating candy all the time. Next week I’m going to try to go on a water cleanse (Just drinking water instead of soda and all that stuff). But bread and nutella are calling my name right now. (Who remembers ironing bread back in boarding school? I think I might try that again haha)

Anyways, I hope you come back next week!

Love you Beautifuls.

xx

Tomi.